A few weekends ago I had the privilege of hearing Dr. Wayne Dyer speak at the I Can Do It Conference in Edmonton, Alberta. He opened his talk by referencing a study conducted by an Australian hospice nurse named Bronnie Ware.
Bronnie spoke with more than 800 terminally ill patients in the last days of their lives and asked them whether they had any regrets and whether there was anything they would have done differently.
Here’s what most people said.
“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life that was true to myself, not the life that others expected of me.”
Wow, that gives me shivers every time I read it because I find it incredibly sad. How awful to go through life not really LIVING.
But I get it, I know why so many people wind up with those regrets. It’s because it can be scary to be true to yourself. And fear is such a crafty little devil. It surfaces as that little voice in your head that tells you things like, “What made you think you could do that?!” or “You’re too old, too young, too poor, not educated enough,” etc. etc. etc.
And because that voice never shuts up, we start to listen to it and we play it safe and never pursue what we really want to!
So I’m going to share an awesome little mind hack that I picked up along my journey that you can easily use to bust through fear like a super hero the next time those nasty ego thoughts start popping up in your mind.
As you may know, I am a BIG proponent of using affirmations such as, “I am capable and successful in achieving my goals.”
But when fear comes up, it will tell you things like, “I’m not capable at all, I don’t even know what I’m doing! Why would anyone want to work with me or read my book or buy my products?”
So we’re going to turn that little frown upside down. And turn that affirmation into a question where you will ask, “What is there about me, that could make me successful in achieving my goals?”
Our minds are amazing…when you ask it a question, it will seek an answer! It will find a way – just like those branches pushing their way up through the asphalt.
Chances are, when you ask yourself this kind of question, tons of reasons will come to mind. But if you can’t come up with an answer, ask a good friend or family member. They may tell you things that you didn’t even know about yourself!
I like to put these questions on sticky notes, or write them on a white board so I can see them every day. And then I take time to write out my answers and what I appreciate about myself.
Try doing this for 21 days and choose something new to appreciate each time. I think you will notice that by focusing on your strengths, capabilities and all the reasons you CAN accomplish your goals, the fear will melt away. And not only that, but the results you seek will start to show up in your life!
Now get out there and show the world what you’re made of! And if you are still struggling with fear, let’s connect!
PS – Read more on affirmations and why you need to be using them here.