As I write this, we are closing in on Halloween and while the weather here in Alberta has been lovely so far this Fall, I am not naïve about what is going to be upon us very soon. My body is already telling me it’s time to hibernate as I crave carbs, chocolate and potato chips to put on a layer of fat to survive the months-long winters that we get here in Calgary.
And while I am really not a fan of the cold AT ALL, winter does afford us an opportunity to slow down a little and check in with ourselves. It’s a great time to put our lives under the microscope and take a hard look at things like our career, relationships, health and lifestyle etc. Once we identify things that aren’t working so well, we can then decide to do something about it. Or, sadly, not.
I hear it all the time, “I hate my job but….” Or, “I know this person isn’t right for me, but….” Or, “I know I am meant to help others and be of spiritual service, but…” When someone says “but” what they really mean is “I’m afraid.”
What they are really saying is:
- “I hate my job but I am afraid to quit before I find a new one because I don’t know if I will find a new one.”
- “I know this person isn’t the right one for me, but I’m afraid that if I end the relationship I won’t find anyone else and I am afraid/don’t like to be alone.”
- “I know that I am meant to be of spiritual service but if I start a spiritually-based career I am afraid of what others will think of me, including my family. They helped me through school financially and now I am afraid I will be letting them down because they don’t understand/support my new career choice.”
So don’t manage fear, kick it in the “but”!!
The “but” is what holds us back from moving forward in a direction we know or feel we are meant to. The knowing and feeling is our internal guidance system (also known as Divine Guidance). But these days, most people don’t acknowledge this guidance even though we receive it each day, every day. And if they do acknowledge it, they are reluctant to trust it enough to actually act on it.
What ends up happening in the situations listed above is a heart/head tug-of-war. The heart tells you to move forward in a way that feels uncomfortable to you, so instead of taking a closer look at the situation/opportunity, you let your head talk you out of it. This behaviour keeps you in your warm and cozy comfort zone.
Well, nobody ever achieved anything great by staying in their comfort zone, my friends. Okay, so I might have “borrowed” that quote but it’s definitely true!
Next time you feel afraid, or fearful, about moving forward, smile! Be happy! This is a big fat sign that you are on the right track!!! When my clients tell me they are afraid I say, “GREAT!” Then they look at me funny and I have to explain that fear is a good thing because, like I said, it means they are on the right track. It’s tangible proof that you are tuning into your inner guidance — you finally HEAR and FEEL it! YAY!!
The neat thing is, once you tune in, you’ll want to keep working with it more and more and you will wonder how you ever got along without it! I know, because although it wasn’t always so, I now use my inner guidance all the time and it’s what helped me to find my true path and purpose in life and reach true fulfillment.
So if you’ve decided to make some changes in your life, but feel some fear creeping in, take a deep breath and go kick some “but”!
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